Welcome back! I hope you all had a great easter and were able to get some extra bate time in! I sadly didn't but I had a great time anyway! I also made up for it on Tuesday when I spent most of the day bating.

Last week Nick and myself had our first Twitter space. It was great being able to hear from other men about what bating meant to them. If you want to listen back to it you can on Twitter. I would also love to hear from you about what you liked or what you would like us to discuss in future episodes

I also want to encourage everyone to come over to the Man Tools Telegram Chat and share your bate with us. It is a welcoming space where you can talk to your fellow bators about what you are doing and what you want to do. So come on in, share a dick pic with us and get to know your fellow bators. 

Don't forget that Jack Daddy Paul has set up a fantastic Mastodon server in which we bators can also gather. If you want to join a welcoming group of bators who all enjoy sharing themselves and talking about bating then come on over and join. We need some active members who want to help us make this not only a great space but a great alternative to other social platforms which don't cater to our needs. 

Today I want to talk about learning about yourself. In particular one of the things I have been thinking a lot about recently is how we change through our bate practice. 

When I started this newsletter in 2021 I enjoyed bating but I don't think I saw myself fully as a bator. I didn't know what I wanted or how I wanted to have pleasure. But slowly I have explored myself and my practice I have changed in the ways in which I express my sexual self. So today I want to break down a couple of different ways in which I feel have contributed to that change in the way I see myself and my sexual pleasure. 

1. How to give yourself pleasure

One of the things that bating teaches you is how to give and receive pleasure from yourself. This is different from the pleasure that you receive from others as it comes only from you. When you are the only one giving yourself pleasure you can be in tune to exactly what you need in the moment. Want to have a quick one, you can. Want to play with toys, you can. Totally free from judgement.

2. That cumming does not need to be the end point

One of the things that most bators talk about is edging. This is the practice of getting yourself close to cumming and then stopping and repeating this over and over. This can teach you a couple of different things about yourself. It can show you how you can deny yourself the act of cumming and how doing so does not take away from the pleasure you receive. It also teaches you that by prolonging pleasure you can enhance your pleasure. 

3. It allows you to explore your body

Often during sex we can end up very focused on our dicks as the sole source of our pleasure. By engaging in self pleasure we start to understand our bodies and what gives us pleasure more. Being able to explore that free from the another person also frees us from some judgement about what we should like.

4. It frees us from pleasure through another

Bating can allow us to do things that we just wouldn't be able to with another person. It allows us to use toys and techniques that are entirely different to partnered sex. Free from those confines we can really begin to explore what self pleasure we can generate just with ourselves and not through sex.

Is there anything else you have found through your bating or self pleasure practice? Do you think that what you enjoy has changed?

Bating has the ability to both put us in touch with ourselves and our self pleasure. But it also has the ability to teach us new ways of being and finding that pleasure. These are not mutually exclusive, either, so as you explore your bate you will learn new things! So get bating!

So I am going to begin profiling people who are apart of the Man Tools Community. There is such a diversity of people who are here that I want to showcase that diversity. If you want to be showcased then please reach out to me and I will add you to my list.

This time we are showcasing Jezza - also known as SFSockGuy

Hello, I’m called Jezza. I’m 42 years old and I live in San Francisco with my partner and our 2 cats. I recently “came out” as solosexual but I’ve been a bator since I was a teenager.In my 20's I began to post my bates on Xtube (now defunct) and I came to enjoy the ability to connect with other male bators via the internet. I have a background in the arts, and I worked for many years as a massage therapist for men. These days I am a professional counselor and sex therapist serving the gay, Bi and queer male community here in SF. I’m also a gamer and I like to wear my vibrating Cockring while I play. I jerk off 2-3 times per day for about an hour each time. I like to watch other amateur bator (jerk off) videos, but I always make time for a purely solosexual bate before bed each night: no porn, no fantasy, just me and my cock feeling blissful and relaxed. I also have a sock and sneakers fetish and I share my socks daily on my instagram! Happy bating bros!

So that's it for another issue. I hope you've enjoyed it and if you have any topics you would like to see covered or any feedback you can always reply to this email or hit me up on socials.

Also if you want to help support this newsletter I would really appreciate you signing up to the VIP Club for just $5 per month. This money is needed to fund the service so that I can continue to provide a space for men to come together and learn about themselves in a safe and inclusive environment. So sign up today!

Till next time Bators
Ben